Self-love is different for different people. For some, self-love is to put themselves on the top of the priority list without any apologies. You should be selfish enough to think about yourself first before thinking about anyone else and you should be proud of that.
We are from a generation where finding love is still a challenge for many and it is a matter of status to have a boyfriend or girlfriend. But we forget the most important essence of any relationship which is Love. To maintain a social status we forget to love the person unconditionally with whom we want to spend our life.
Most of us are unable to love any other person because we are not aware of the concept of self-love. We forget to love ourselves first. Whenever any person talks about self-love people tend to make of that concept. This is generally because we never really look after ourselves.
We are a generation where if anybody compliments us we disregard that and if anybody criticizes us we then activate our night owl mode and spend our entire night thinking about it. This is the most common tendency of most of us because we don’t want to see criticism as feedback.
Let’s Move away from Perfectionism
Have you ever thought about how imperfect you are? No, we haven’t, because we don’t want to be imperfect. But let me help you wake up a bit, we are all imperfect but we don’t want to accept ourselves that way.
It’s all about accepting who you really are. We live in a world which is full of filters and hence we are now okay hiding behind filters in real life too.
How can we move away from ideal Perfectionism? First, we need to understand that it’s not about being perfect to self-love but it’s about accepting you the way you are to self-love.
The most important thing to adapt to self-love and be happy always is to stop depending on your happiness on any other person. You should be empowered enough to take charge of your own happiness. In a world full of temporary people and temporary feelings you should be self-reliant enough to not hamper your happiness according to the arrival or departure of any other person.
The moment you take charge of your own happiness from that exact moment you will love yourself unconditionally without any benefit of the doubt.
Listen to Yourself
It’s okay to say ‘NO’. If you feel that doing something or seeing someone will hamper your mental health, then please learn to say no. Saying no will not make you a bad person but rather it will make you a better version of yourself.
A version that keeps you as a priority. Everyone wants to be someone’s priority so why not make ourselves our priority. Say “NO” whenever you want to. Listen to yourself, listen to your mind and do as it says because your mind will never want to upset you.
Listening is always a good practice. The more you listen the more you are able to strengthen your relationship and communication in it. So why not listen to ourselves and strengthen our bond with ourselves. Let’s remove all the barriers, doubts and thoughts and try listening to ourselves.
For many people, the concept of self-love is very limited and wrong. Whenever anyone hears the word “Self Love” the image which they have in mind is “Tree-hugging Hippies” or “cheesy self-help books”. But no this is not self-love. No book, No social media post, No blog can help you love yourself until and unless you chose to love yourself and chose to stick to yourself no matter what.
Spending time with yourself, doing what makes you feel good, listening to what calms you, having a hobby etc., will help you nourish yourself and will make the bond with yourself stronger. For once, for your own sake try to live like a free bird and do what makes you happy, half of the problems will go away.